Pray For Ramey

     As I was lying in bed last night praying for a family friend that had lost her husband in an accident, I began to ask the Lord, what do I say to her, what would you have me say. Everyone’s stories are different, and emotionally many of us are in different places. I especially wasn’t sure because I know that the Lord walked me through my experience every step of the way, and I could see it.  I kind of pondered the thought that most of us have not come to the place where we can accept God’s plan, we don’t seem to be able to reconcile how, if God is good, then why this route for my life.

     I think when we are in that place, we are saying, I had big plans Lord…we were serving you…..I thought you wanted us to do this, or that. I think that we look at the situation and say, wait a minute Lord; I thought you were going to use my family in a particular way, and we were going to minister for your glory. I know I have been in that place before myself.

      As I thought about this last night, as I walked through the past year of my life, and how I initially thought that the Lord was calling Ramey and I into a cancer ministry. I was 100% confident that she was going to be healed in the end in order for us to perform this ministry. I knew very early on in Ramey’s battle that the Lord impressed upon me that we were going to have to go through the full trial. So many times as people came and prayed for her, I prayed, but in my heart I knew that God was not going to heal her, right then. I thought it would be later. So as the trial went on she had her 1^st surgery, and that followed with a very slow recovery. The Lord began to stretch my faith just a little. As the recovery was slow, I was dealing with a lot of Ramey’s emotional trauma. She lost a good bit of vision and it didn’t look like she was going to be able to drive ever again. I think she worried about dying and leaving Judah with no mommy, but she wouldn’t really tell me that…so I would just see her very often down, and depressed emotionally. Then as she began to recover and she began to get some energy back, we began to bond together like never before. We were able to spend every day together. I used pretty much all of my sick leave and most of my vacation that I had been earning over the past 10 years to be able to be home with her the whole time. We began to spend quality time together reading the Bible together and just enjoying a very close, intimate friendship, something I think, that we had almost forgotten. Unfortunately this wonderful time only lasted for a few short weeks. As Ramey and I returned from visiting my family in NJ, and a doctor’s visit to Sloan Kettering Memorial Hospital in Manhattan, the hardest part of the trial began.

     As we had been in a deep discussion over further treatment options over the past several weeks, we thought, “Let’s wait and check out all the options before we dive into Chemo and Radiation.” As we tried everything to avoid it, I felt the Lord tell me again that we were going to have to go through the full trial. “OK”, I thought, “I guess we had better start getting ready for the radiation treatment.” At this point, we were on our way back from NJ, and Ramey began to have severe headaches during the trip. It made me very nervous, because I thought that shouldn’t be happening right now. As the headaches grew more severe, we scheduled an appointment to have another MRI done just to see if anything was going on. During this waiting period, there were many days and nights where I had to sit and watch my wife suffer, and suffer severely. I remember watching her and encouraging her to praise the Lord even for the pain, because we are to give thanks in all things ….for if God allowed the suffering, then it had to be for a purpose, and if it had to be for a purpose, then according to Romans 8:28, it must be for a good and perfect purpose. Let me say this though, nothing is harder than watching a loved one suffer in agonizing pain.

     I remember finally hitting a breaking point with the Lord. One evening as Ramey was in severe pain with a headache, she was so delirious that she was calling me “mom”, and crying out for me to help her. I remember, I was at the point where I pretty much collapsed on the floor by the couch, and just wept before the Lord and just said, “ I can’t handle this, why aren’t you helping us, you have to bring relief, I can’t do this anymore.”  Later that morning, we took Ramey into the hospital. While at the hospital she was delirious and would not listen to anyone. She would go in and out of consciousness and didn’t recognize anyone in the room including her dad. She didn’t know who I was, but she would listen to my voice as I calmly held her down in her bed to keep her from tearing her clothes off and trying to walk out of the hospital. I was scared….very scared, and I thought that she was going to die that day, and at the time I wasn’t quite prepared for that.

     Ramey was placed in an ambulance and transported up to Duke University Hospital to be evaluated for a 2^nd surgery, and to see if there was anything that we could do. During the trip she was given high doses of steroids which brought the inflammation down in her head, this eased her headaches. Kathy (her mom) rode with her on the ambulance, and I went home to get cleaned up and packed, not knowing how long we were going to be up there again. About an hour later I received a text from Kathy telling me that Ramey was doing well, and was talking. I thought, what? Yes, she was talking and sharing the gospel with the two EMT’s taking her to Duke. I immediately felt that relief from the Lord, that sense of peace that things are still under control. I wasn’t sure what the point of the past couple of days of agony were for, but I just felt that peace that God was behind the wheel. I thought to myself, Lord this is the second time, I’ve been taken to my breaking point (the first was the first surgery, and the thought of losing her) again. I thought, “What’s the deal, I hate being taken to that point?” Well, I hadn’t slept for several days so I took about a 2 hour nap, showered, and hopped in my car and raced up to see her at Duke (and no, I was not doing the speed limit…or anything remotely close to it J ). I remember I was so excited to see her normal and talking. I made it in record time.

     Through a series of Doctor visits up there, they said the tumor had grown back. Ramey said she didn’t want to go through surgery again, as it had only been a month since she had fully recovered from the last one. I asked the doctor if we could try Radiation at this point, or did we have to have the surgery in order to save her life. A consensus from the Doctors was that, the surgery was recommended, but that they thought Radiation was also an option. We talked (Ramey, me, and her parents), and we thought, let’s get back home, let’s try the radiation, and let’s get on with life.

     Well, as we got home, many problems arose with Ramey. The high dose of steroids knocked her out a lot, and she could barely walk 20 feet without passing out. Several times she did this in my arms, and it took all of my strength just to get her back into bed, or to the couch. Every trip for me was traumatic, as I constantly worried about the damage all this stuff was doing to her brain. We waited for about a week for MUSC to start her treatments, but I found out from the Doctor that the reason it was taking so long was that the actual Radiation Plan; The plan for how they were going to beam the radiation into the tumor was so complex due to the size of the tumor that they were concerned. Ramey stared back with the headaches again and she could no longer walk. I had to lift her into the bathroom, and Kathy would help clean her with me. I remember walking outside and sitting on a bench overlooking the pond in the backyard, and thinking…”Here I am again Lord; I’m at another breaking point..I hate this…please give me some answers.” I felt the Lord tell me to call her Doctor. I did and told him to set me up with the best surgeon at MUSC. The surgeon’s office called back, and we had an appointment the next morning. I felt some relief, “Ok, maybe we will have to have another surgery, but at least we will be home, and she’ll get the best care at the hospital right now.” I remember the last day we spent at home; I read parts of the book of Revelation to Ramey. We talked about how wonderful Heaven, and the New Heavens and Earth will be. We talked about how this time in our life is changing who we will be forever. That if we submit to God’s will and use this to bring Him glory, that we have an awesome opportunity to store up rewards in Heaven that will last for all of eternity. Ramey was so full of the Holy Spirit at this point, pretty much everything that came out of her mouth was praises for the Lord, for what he had done on the Cross for us. She had a one track mind and that was to give all of the glory to the Lord.

    I remember the next morning, as we got ready to take her to the appointment with the surgeon, I picked her up to put her in the wheelchair. Her body froze, a likely seizure, and I knew in my heart that they were going to have to do something at the hospital or she was going to die soon. I remember, I called my mom and told her to pray that the hospital would  take her and say that they can do the surgery. When we got to MUSC, the Doctor saw us, looked at her MRI, and set her up for surgery the next morning. I thought….. “Thank you Lord.” Relief. I realized at this point that whatever happened to her at this point was completely in God’s hands. There were no decisions left to be made, there were no options, it was either God heal her, or God take her.

     At this point, as Ramey was about to get wheeled in for her second surgery, she was happy and at perfect peace. She said she wasn’t afraid to die. I realized then, that I wasn’t afraid either. Why? For me, the Lord brought me through a series of breaking points, where he stretched my faith in Him. Each time he brought me relief. It was a constant series of stretching, then relief..stretching then relief.

     Following the second surgery, the Doctor came in and told me that the Tumor was enormous, and that there was a lot of damage. He told me that had she not come in, she would have died at home within the next 3 days. I remember how I felt hearing how bad her condition was, but at the same time so thankful that I didn’t wake up next to her dead in our bed.

     I remember thinking, why all of the suffering Lord, after all, she was a faithful servant of Yours? It then became so clear that the suffering, the stretching, prepared the way for me later on to accept her death.

     Once you understand  scripture, you seethat death is a necessary part of our life, this is what frees us to be with the Lord forever and ever. Having a temporal earthly perspective on life, that this life is it, that it’s supposed to be all fun and games, that this is the ultimate goal, the “American Dream” is not Biblical. If the it was Biblical then certainly the disciples, the men who physically walked and talked with Jesus, would have had an easy life of peace and tranquility right? Well, read it for yourself, you won’t find it played out in Jesus earthly life, as he suffered and died, or as the disciples later suffered and died themselves.  So as I lay in bed thinking all this through, I just kept thinking, why did the apostle Paul suffer? Why? I mean Jesus appeared to him on the road to Damascus, He personally revealed himself to him. Paul changed at that point, he wasn’t in rebellion anymore, he wasn’t walking in sin. He was faithfully preaching the gospel, doing what Jesus called him to do. So then, I thought, why would God ask Paul to suffer? Was it punishment, I don’t think so. When we go through trials in our life, is it punishment? Maybe, there are definite consequences to sin, but what about when we’re doing everything right, what then? Why would the Lord bring trials into our life when were walking faithfully with Him, when were intimately fellowshipping with Him, when were outwardly serving Him?

     Why? I think we have trouble understanding because our perspective is here and now. We can’t see the beauty that God has prepared for us. Jesus perspective is eternal. He knows the future; He sees the gold that these refining fires are going to produce in us. He sees who we will be in our glorified state in Heaven, and He knows that this temporary, yet very painful trial, is but for a season. God has huge plans for His children. Just because we don’t understand it all completely doesn’t matter. Look what Jesus said in Luke 18:28-30…. “There is no man that has left his house, parents, brothers and sisters, wife, or children for the Kingdom of God’s sake, who shall receive manifold more in this present time, and in the world to come Everlasting Life.” Jesus is clearly trying to get the point across that there will be loss for the sake of the gospel, but it doesn’t compare to the glory, to the rewards that await us. Have you lost a loved one and used the tragedy of it as a catapult for the gospel? If not, let the Lord use you now.

     2 Cor 4:17-18 says, “For our LIGHT afflictions, but for a moment (hallelujah!), worketh a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory …for the things which are seen, are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal”. So Paul says his sufferings, are 1. For us to know God. 2. To develop our spiritual “man” for all of eternity. 3. To keep our dependence upon Him. Whenever we get caught up in this life in America, we become dependent upon our riches, our security; we become focused on the temporal, and could care less about the eternal. For me, Ramey’s death made me intimately dependent upon Jesus and what he did on the cross. If Jesus didn’t die for us then Ramey’s life would have been a tragedy, a complete disaster, and for me there would be no hope to ever see her again. For me, if that was the case, I would have no reason to want to finish out this life. But through this suffering, I am able to fully appreciate the fact that Jesus provide a way for me to see her again, and that He prepared eternity for me (and you), so that this earthly tragedy has no long-term sting. IT IS JUST TEMPORARY!

Don’t forget, our loved ones who died believing that Jesus is their Lord and Savior, are present with the Lord right now (2 Cor 5:6-8). We don’t have to worry about them; they already have God’s perspective. I’m sure if they could come back and tell us anything, it wouldn’t be  …  “ I miss you”…or  “you look great!”, it would be to tell us that none of this junk matters…serve the Lord with everything you’ve got…You can’t quite see it yet, but wait till you get here!, earn as many rewards as you can………and “ Oh Yeah, my suffering,…..It was worth it!”

      We have a choice when we go through difficulty; we can choose to stick to our own wishes and desires, our own master plan for our life that we so intricately planned out, or when tragedy strikes, and our life begins to change course, or we can surrender our will , and allow the Lord to take the wheel.  When we surrender our will, we begin to ask God questions like, Lord what do you have for me now? How are you preparing me for the future? How will this prepare me to reach the lost for You? It’s when we surrender our will that the unsaved see our life, the strength that God has given us, the faith that God has given us to trust Him even through disaster, that they say, Ok, maybe God is real. I just watched this Christian walk through a tragedy that would have obliterated me, but they are praising the Lord through it…what? If you look throughout scripture, when people acted in faith to God, even though they didn’t exactly know what the future held, or what the exact purpose was, it brought about God’s glory, and the furtherance of the gospel. There are a zillion examples in the Bible…Abraham with Isaac; Paul in the prison after the earthquake, Elijah and the prophets of Baal….it goes on and on. God didn’t call the strong and mighty, he called and used those who trusted their very lives to Him.  

     We talk about … “Lord use me”, so the Lord begins to prepare us for ministry to be used, and we say… “Wait a minute Lord, this isn’t what I expected, this is too hard, I just wanted to do ministry…you know, just share the gospel and stuff.” What if no Christians suffered or went through difficulty, how would we reach the world around us, when we have no genuine empathy for what they are dealing with? How do we expect to be ready for spiritual warfare when we haven’t been trained and prepared first? What if my son Judah wanted to be a Marine Sniper in a few years, and the recruiter signed him up, walked him out the back of the building, onto a bus to the airport, where he was handed his rifle and all of his gear. Then he was flown over to Afghanistan and told to go hide up on a mountain ridge and take out the enemy. What? No training, no preparation, NOT REALISTIC! In the same way we pray, Lord use me, I just want to be used. God says, great; follow me to boot camp, so that you will be prepared for spiritual battle. It’s at that point that most of us bail out and say, “It’s too hard Lord, I’ll pass, I don’t want to finish my training, I’m going to find a place to hide out.” In doing so we miss out on the opportunities to suffer and intimately know the heart of a Loving God. We miss out on all of our potential, on all of our eternal rewards. Jesus already set the example of suffering….the disciples followed in his example…..and we may very well be called to suffer as well. Don’t be afraid of it. God will pour out his supernatural grace exactly when you need it. He will not give you more then what you can bare with His strength.  God loves you, don’t be tricked into believing that trials are bad, there are no accidents or tragedies in the life of a believer. God is in complete control, just settle down, and trust Him J

John

Hi there,

     I am writing this post in case some new visitors are checking out the site for the first time. This weekend is the Angels Among Us 5k fundraiser at Duke University. Some of the runners coming to the race in memorial to Ramey are going to be sharing some of the Cards that we had made up months ago. The Cards reference this website.

    So if you are new, here’s the deal. This blogsite was set up as a daily/weekly update on Ramey’s condition last summer, so in order to view the earlier posts, just scroll to the bottom right sideof the page, you’ll see a monthly calender, a the bottom of the calendar you can click by month. The biggest blog months were July and August. Ramey passed away in July, so I would start there.  Embedded in one of those blogs is a link to listen to her funeral online. I know  your thinking..”I’ll pass on that.” Thats fine, but for some of you, after reading about Ramey, and watching her video, you may want to hear further on how God used her circumstances to bring hope to others. If you look to the top right hand corner of the page, you see News links, if you click on it, an entry will pop up with a link to the newspaper, click on it and read the article, then click on the picture that says video. This video was taken a month before her first surgery, so you get to see Ramey full on There is also a gallery of pictures that you can view by clicking on Photo Album, which is located right next to news links. Additionally, if anyone had follow up questions, or wanted to contact me personally, my email is john.reeves06@comcast.net  (the middle is zero-six not the letter o). I pray that this website continues to be an encouragement for others, that they might know that God loves them, He cares about them, and He wants to walk with them through their own trials, and that God alone is the ultimate source of healing and strength.

John

Hi everyone, (if anyone’s still there

    Just wanted to drop a few lines to let everyone know how things are going here in Charleston. Judah just completed his 3rd semester and only has about 6 weeks of school left for the year (after we get back from this vacation). So far this has been his best school year scholastically and disciplinarily (?).. So thank the Lord for that. I think we are both adjusting well, including days and occasionally a week of some pretty down moments. Shayna has been here for several months, and through a series of life changing decisions (     ) has decided to move here to Charleston to be a intigrual part of Judah’s life. It is very difficult for me to put into words the impact that she has had on Judah and I. She has taken Judah into her arms and treats him like her very own. Judah is completely in love with her too! She loves on him and picks him up from school everyday. She takes him to the park, and does cool stuff with him just like Ramey did. Soon she will be taking him to drum lessons once a week in Mt. Pleasant to begin his musical career. Shayna is 1 of 2 , of the most wonderful girls ever made in the USA… (thanks Terry and Kathy

     So about our Easter Vacation…were heading to Lynchburg this week to get away. Work has been good, but I’m getting pretty worn out. I think statistically I usually take a vacation every three months max. So right now I’m at my three months and I am completely worn down. I am very thankful for my job, but I can’t wait to leave my pager at the house, and not worry about answering my cellphone for a week. I don’t know if we will do anything overly cool, but I really don’t care. I think Shay and I are planning on hiking the Peaks of Otter one day if we can. Other than that I think we may go to Busch Gardens for a day, but if we don’t thats ok, Judah just wants to get there and play with all of his friends and I am excited for him to play with them too.

     Ok…so many people have been asking me lately…so how are you doing…..well honestly this week…..pretty blah! Wait a minute, how can he be so blah…hes always doing so well? you ask. I laugh to myself as I write this because I really did have a terrible week, but the Lord has really strengthened me today, and I am really thankful. I think, like all of us, that even when we go through difficulties and survive them, and are doing well, we can sometimes go backwards, and look at our circumstances and say…..”wait a minute Lord, I thought my life would be back together by now, whats going on?” Sometimes I think, how long Lord before life is good again. I’m sure that many of you can relate to that feeling. I don’t mean that we were running on adrenaline, but that there are definitely times in our life where we requestion the Lord’s decisions. I personally sometimes find myself saying…”Lord, was there any other way? Did it have to go down like this? Can I trade for my old life back?” The answer is obviously “no”, but it is an honest feeling, and usually for me begins a good dialogue of prayer between me and the Lord. But, as usual the Lord brings me back to scripture, and solidifies what he said to me long ago. 2 Corinthians 4:17, 18

     As I was opening the cabinet drawer to the left of the refrigerator yesterday, I couldn’t help but notice the handwritten schedule of vitamins that Shayna had written for Ramey last year to remind her of what to take, and when. At the bottom of the sheet was the above scripture and it reads: 

          ” For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.”

The apostle Paul wrote that. Big deal right. Sure anyone can endure light afflictions. But look who’s talking here. Paul, who had been beaten many times, thrown in prison, shipwrecked, and probably stoned to death (but supernaturally healed Acts 14:19, 2 Corinthians chapter 12) So wait a minute, I think, as I’m staring at this verse on the vitamin list. Paul’s saying hang in there…why?  Because these light afflictions are temporary, and they are “light” in comparison with the amazing eternal changes are taking place in us that will define who we are in Christ for all eternity. The outside view of these afflictions in our life, are small potatoes in comparison to what these trials are really developing inside of us for all of eternity. Paul is saying, “please….give me more….if this is what it takes to produce eternal changes in me.” According to 2 Cor chapter 12, many scholars believe that Paul was referring to himself when he said that..” I knew a man in Christ….one caught up into the third Heaven….how that he was caught up into paradise….and heard unspeakable words, which it is not lawful for a man to utter.” As Paul alludes in the following verses, what God revealed through revelation to him during this time was so magnificent that he was given a “thorn in the flesh” to keep Paul humble (v.7)

     So why is that so important. I look at Paul’s life, he gave up probably his wife (because he was part of the Sanhedrin, and part of their requirements were to have been married, and his wife is never mentioned ) because he became a follower of Christ, he was nearly beaten to death many times. He was constantly being falsely accused by the Jews. His LIFE WAS DIFFICULT.. This is what I think. When Christ revealed himself to Paul, he saw the risen Lord for who he was. This was so real to Paul, that Paul no longer considered his life to mean anything except for the sake of the Cross. Paul says in v. 10 ” Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.”  Paul’s life is an example to us, that these things that come into our life are to bring our dependence back to God, and to develop our ” spiritual man” to be above and beyond what we so often times want to settle our Christian walk to be. Are there times when we are going to think, we can’t make it through, its too difficult. Yes, I know I do. We have to remember that God is developing our Faith. For without Faith it is impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6). An example of this comes to mind for me. When I graduated from the Police Academy and subsequently from my training officer, I was left to “Police” on my own. Being 22 years old, I often thought, I have no idea what I am doing, and this is crazy to think that people are counting on me to know what I am doing. I told this to several senior officers, and their reply was..your fine, you know what your doing. I always thought to myself..”No I don’t!” There were many scary moments there for the first few years, but over time I developed a pretty good sense of what to do, and how to make good decisions; but it wasn’t because I clung to my training officer, it was because I stepped out “in faith” so to speak, and did it. 

     When I went through Ramey’s trial, I hit the same moments, of …”I can’t do it….I’m not ready…..I’m not prepared…….” As I looked at my current plight, I couldn’t help but remember back to how many times in my life I felt that way, and how many times I realized that yes..I was ready, I was prepared, but I just didn’t realize it because I was afraid. The Lord showed me that..yes I was prepared to go on without Ramey. What? Yes, I was prepared. God said, ”Your ready, your going to have to walk by faith, not by sight.” It was during this time that I said back to God, ”OK Lord..if your saying this is whats going to happen, then your going to have to give me the strength to do it..to get through this.” When I surrendered this part of my life…my desire for Ramey to be healed…my ideal plans for my life, for my family, for the future, God supernaturally gave me the grace and strength to complete the work that he began in me (Philippians 1:6).

    So why am I saying this tonight. Because like you, I question , I second guess..whether I am really ready for this…”this is too hard Lord”, I think to myself sometimes, but he whispers softly…”Your ready, your prepared, walk by Faith, not by sight. ” As I was at a very low point yesterday, I read that verse….”light afflictions….eternal weight of glory”, and I get it again. This is about eternity, and what God is developing in me. This is for you too, your trials and tribulations are not for nothing, God is preparing you and prepping you, and training you, just like a boot camp, for your the future, for eternity. Don’t get swept up in the temporary difficulties of this life. Its all going to be worth it. All of it.

Love,

John

P.S. I have been volunteering with Hospice and have some awesome experiences to share with you guys. Hopefully I will write it later this week.

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to say hi and share some of the things that have been on my heart. As Ramey and I’s anniversary date approaches (March 8th- would have made 11 years) I find myself a little emotional, occassionally. For any guys reading this post, that does not mean that I was crying…OK….(kidding). So as I reflect, I watched her video thats on the post and courier link, and I just can’t believe that shes really not here. I think, wow, Lord…are you sure this was your plan, how this was suppossed to go. I mean…wasn’t there any easier options? If you’ve ever been through anything similar you know what I mean, its like you can visualize her sitting right there….right in the same chair that shes on in the video. You can see her talking, and laughing, and chewing gum….. while she’s talking and laughing…ON CAMERA! It’s like it just happened yesterday, but at the same time without watching the video, I sometimes feel like I can’t even remember what it was like to have her around.

     So- what to do in times like this. Go to the scriptures!

     The other morning as I read through Isaiah 7:1-9 . As I read through this chapter, you see King Ahaz, one of the more wicked Kings of Israel (the southern part called Judah), as he is facing a confrontation with Northern Israel and Syria. God speaks through the prophet Isaiah to tell the king not to worry about it, “I got it covered, these guys aren’t going to do anything, as a matter of fact, in a few years, Northern Israel won’t even exist. Isaiah says in verse 4 ” Fear not”….but then says ” if ye will not believe, surely ye shall not be established.” In other words, if you don’t trust and have faith in the promise from God, you will not be “established”-”grounded”- “secure”- you will be living in FEAR! What I find most interesting is that we see throughout scripture that when God makes a promise- regardless of how wimpy our faith is sometimes- That promise is going to be fulfilled. That promise is not dependent on us, whether or not we waiver in our belief sometimes. God says “It’s going to happen”, and it will. It’s our decision, our choice, whether or not we are going to stand firm on that promise. Look in verse 9, God says if you don’t believe, your going to be a wreck…Not- if you don’t believe then it won’t actually happen. So for you and I, what are we going to do with God’s promises. I mean Romans 8:28 says that ”All things work together for good”- right? Will we stand firm on the Promise, like on a Solid Rock, so that we remain balanced, steady, and in the boldness that God will complete what he promised (Phillipians 1:6- To complete what he started) or are we going to take what God has promised to us and doubt it, and continue to live in “panic” mode, in fear, in worry. The reality is God sees the beginning to the end. There are no surprises for Him. When he makes a promise-He keeps it.- Trust in That. 

John

Well Hello, Hello to all,

     I’m sure that some of you thought that I made a run for the border or something. But no, I’ve just been adjusting to my new life. Much to say, not all tonight, but I just want to say that God truely is good. Judah and I are doing great. We have been spending nearly everyday with Terry and Kathy. Now Shayna (Ramey’s sister) is in town and it seems as though our life is almost complete again. I am so grateful for our family.

     So much has been going on the past few months, and I know that many people have gone through their own trials during this time. So many people to pray for, and it seems that everywhere I turn, people are getting cancer. So whats the deal? Why are so many Christian families going through these kinds of trials. As a matter a fact, someone asked me that just recently. I just shared with them, that as I went through my trial and read the New Testament, I realized that Jesus disciples didn’t even escape trials. They all suffered, were persecuted, and died for speaking the testimony of Jesus Christs’ death and resurrection. So wait a minute, I’ve heard many preachers talk about Christians should never be sick, or broken hearted, if they are right with God. I mean, suffering, and trials only come to those not walking close to the Lord right? Well, you can answer that one for yourself, just start reading the the New Testament and see for yourself. The disciples, the ones who walked and talked with Jesus face to face, died torturous deaths, many of them. So then I said, wait a minute if Jesus didn’t get his own disciples out of facing hardship, what gives me the right to think that I’m qualified to stay free from trials and hardships. Thats the point, were not qualified. Jesus never promised that we wouldn’t go through difficulty, but He promised to never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). He promised that no matter what we see or go through that “All things work together for good for those that love God and are called according to his purpose” -Romans 8:28. Ok, so nobody is exempt from difficulties, not even Christians? Thats right. Why? Because this earth, this life was never meant to be our permanent home, this is not our only existence. This life is just the precursor for the life to come. Think about the times in your life when everything is perfect. It is hard for anybody not facing difficulty to genuinely look up and say “Jesus I need you right now.” We are so spoiled in American culture, that we so easily get trapped in the latest fad, and in our comfortable lifestyles. We hardly need anything. The most we pray sometimes is “Lord, help me make my car payment.” Hey I’m guilty of it too. Think about it, if God is preparing a place in Heaven for us and He is preparing us here on earth for what we are going to be doing for the next Zillion years, then don’t you think we need to be prepping ourselves for it. Well, the answer to that question is..we don’t want to prep for it. Instead, we try not to think about it, and say “that will  be nice someday”, but for now I will be out back in the hot tub relaxing. Then, all of a sudden, trajedy strikes our family, and everything becomes meaningless, except for whats at stake. Everything in life would be traded for our family member or friend to not have to suffer. Our perspective on life shifts to the eternal, to whats really important. That is God’s perspective. He cuts right through the garbage. He already knows the future, He knows what he has prepared for us. He knows how awesome its going to be. So he says….John, I can’t let you get out of this trial..I know its hard, but I need you to keep a crystal clear perspective on life. I have great plans for you. I am developing you for future use..not just here, but for all eternity. Maybe your in the same boat, maybe you don’t understand how God could leave you high and dry right now. Look, Jesus died and suffered so that we (all those who trust in Jesus) will be together forever and ever- never to suffer again. This is just temporary. God is preparing you for future use. We think were left high and dry, because we can’t see the outcome from our vantage point. Thats ok, thats where your faith kicks in. This is where you count on the promise of Romans 8:28 with EXPECTATION. Look this is not a maybe promise. God is using this circumstance for your good. Well, you may not have much faith right now. Thats ok,  Jesus said in Matthew 17:20 that if you have faith.. the size of a mustard seed…that you can move mountains (paraprased)! Jesus knows your heart, He knows that your are weak right now. Go to him, trust in him, surrender what you wish to happen to Him. After Moses died, God told Joshua ” Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go” (NKJV Joshua 1:9)  Let me ask you this…what would be the point of God telling you these things, if he didn’t already now that the times WERE COMING when you would ‘feel discouraged’ when your faith was barely size of a ‘mustard see’, when difficult, tragic things were going to happen, thats why he said that these will all ‘work out for good’ in the end. Why? because that is part of living in a world that has been destroyed by sin. Bad things happen here, but look up, its temporary. This season of your life will be over, and a beautiful new one will begin. Look we have a future and a hope in what Jesus did on the cross. We now have a free all expense paid gauranteed eternal retirement, where there will be “no more tears” (Revelation 21:4) It’s going to be okay. God has already promised it, and its as good as done. Have hope, and Thank Jesus, that this life is not all there is! Hey, in the end…WE WIN!

     Hi and welcome to the site. My name is John and I am Ramey’s husband. We created this site initially for friends and family to keep up with Ramey’s progress as she battled a malignant brain tumor. As things progressed from May 2008 until now you can backtrack the blogs to get an idea of Ramey’s story, and how God used her life and death in such an amazing way. If you look to the top right corner of the screen there are links to Ramey’s news article that was posted back in March 2008 right after her first surgery. Additonally, there is a awesome video clip of her story that gives you a really good look, and idea of who she was and what she believed. As you view the video clip of her you will see that her faith in Jesus Christ gave her the strength to get through the most difficult trial that she would ever face here on earth. Our prayer is that you see her strength and courage, and that those of you who may be facing similar circumstances yourself or in your family may see that Jesus is the only true source of peace. For those of you who see the article and video and are interested in finding out more about Ramey, and her faith, I encourage you to scroll down the blog site until you see a post with  Ramey’s Memorial Service imbedded in it. I think that you will find her Memorial service to be very encouraging, especially if you are going through a difficult situation right now. I know your thinking- “Thats crazy I would never listen to a funeral unless I absolutely had to!” I would say the same thing. But, i promise you that this service will be unlike any that you have heard before, and it is very likely that you will view your personal situation in a new light at its conclusion. Please, if you are going through a difficult time, please listen to the Memorial Service. In addition, feel free to email me at john.reeves06@comcast.net if you have further questions about faith in Jesus. Also you can email Pastor Sean as well at the crossover website listed to the right. Again, I just want to say that no matter how difficult of situation you are in, God wants to use it for something Awesome!

John

Hello everyone,

     Surprise surprise, its been a while since I have been able to get on here. I know that some of you may be wondering whats the lastest down here in Charleston. First i just wanted to let everyone know that we are working on getting the video posted on here of the memorial service, and also if anyone wants a cd of Ramey’s and are from out of town then please email me at john.reeves06@comcast.net , and I will get one out to you. Also, some of you may have seen the Franklin Graham crusade is here next weekend at the North Charleston Coliseum. If any VA friends would like to come down for that, we have a spare bedroom at the house, (and a couch) we are probably less than 10min from the facility. Please let me know, after a complete background check, and credit report, you maybe eligible to stay with us, Ha ha!

     Ok enough of the business, Judah and I are doing pretty good. We definetly each have our moments, but God has been continually strengthening us. Just to let you know some of the upcoming things God has been doing. In November I will be preaching at Horizon fellowship in Summerville SC, for pastor Skip- he will be at retreat. Those of you who live up in that area that may not have a home church, feel free to come and visit, it is a really need group of believers there. I will put out more info on that later next month. Recently God has been burdening me to begin a Bible study for Police Officers hosted at our church. I don’t know exactly which day a week its going to be, but I am praying to get started by October. I am very excited about it and ask for your prayers that many will come to Jesus. Also on a side note Judah and I went back to Hospice last Sunday where Ramey was. I felt like God had wanted me to go back there and minister to those who are sick there. It is a very interesting place because many people can still talk, walk-or wheel around, and would love to talk. I had an opportunity to share with an elderly lady while I was there. It was awesome. I thought that I would have many opportunities but Hospice called me to let me know that I have to take a one day class in order to be a volunteer. Unfortunetly the next class isn’t until Dec 6th. I spoke with the person in charge of the volunteers and she explained that many people are at home Hospice care, and many live close by my house.  Instead of going to the facility to minister, we will just go to those that live in our area. From what she said, they have many volunteers for the facility, but not many for the home visitations. I believe that this is going to be an amazing opportunity for Judah and I to share with others and their families. There are many children, believe it or not, in home hospice care. I think that this will be a special opportunity for Judah to minister to these children as well as me. I just want to say this to those that may be thinking, or wishing that they could have opportunities to minister to those who are hurting. Here’s your chance. I challenge anyone of you to pray and ask God if he would lead you to hook up with Hospice in your hometown. I can tell you that Ramey’s death is a constant daily reminder for me that I am just passing through this world, and that my time could  be very short as well. I need to take every opportunity to share Jesus with people. The reality of “wasting my time” on the trivial things in life still hits me every morning. I can’t thing of anything better than to minister to someone who you know will be facing death soon. Seeing that reality, for many Christians, will keep life in perspective. Please pray about it, there are so many dying without the knowledge of Jesus. I am sure that you can contact your local hospital and ask them for the numbers to Hospice. I just want to encourage everyone to continue on in ministry, Jesus is coming!

Love you guys,

John

Hi everyone,

     I finally have a few minutes tonight to get on the computer. I just wanted to say a few things to help encourage those who are going through a rough time right now. Specifically for those who were close to Ramey.

     I know that Ramey’s battle was significant for many of us as it brought a sense of reality to our own lives. We took the time to consider what was really important, and if what we were doing with the majority of our time really had any eternal value. We spent extra time in prayer, and were in constant communication with God about her situation. Through that time many of us drew really close to the Lord as we looked to him for strength. We also spent time in prayer with each other as some of our personal “walls” began to drop in desperation of Ramey’s condition. I heard many people say that Ramey’s sickness had drawn them closer to family and friends,and closer to God. Many of us were encouraged as God poured out his Spirit and strengthened us during that time and following the Memorial Service. I would just like to say a couple of things because I know that there are many of us that are battling discouragement right now. I think that alot of it stems from the reality that we can’t spend time with Ramey anymore while were here on earth, and for many of us that is a huge loss. It seems that the very thing that began to unite the body of Christ is in someways now, discouraging the body of Christ. I mean that in the sweetest way. Although its okay to be sad for our temporary loss of her,  we have to keep our eyes looking up, upon Jesus. As i was reading Genesis 23:3,4 this morning, it talked about the death of Sarah, Abraham’s wife. She was 127 years old, when she died. Abraham wept and mourned for her,(just like we are for Ramey), and Abraham stands up and says ” I am a stranger and a sojourner with you (speaking to the children of Heth) give me a burying place that I may bury my dead out of sight.” There are a couple of points here that Jon Courson brings out in his commentary that I want you to see. The first is that Abraham says I am a stranger and sojourner. As he saw the death of his dear wife, he realized that she was no longer here, and that he is only a stranger , or pilgrim in this life also. In the same way Ramey’s death brought about an understanding for me that this life is so temporary, this is not my destiny or my final resting place, this is my training ground for eternity.

Abraham then wants to buy a burying place that is out of his sight. He wasn’t trying to erect this giant monument of Sarah that everyone can see, but bury her respectfully, but not in a way that He is going to try to cling on to her after her death. In the same way some of us maybe are looking to Ramey’s example and saying, ” I can’t be like that” or “who is going to take her place.” The reality of it is that God wants to use each of us to fill that void, that gap in ministry that Ramey was able to plug into. It is up to us to ask God to give us the strength and opportunity to complete the work that He has already begun in us (Phillipians 1:6). Yes its much easier to run from our grief, to isolate ourselves from one another, to keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves and not reach out to others since we are hurting as well. In the same way that Abraham wanted to bury Sarah out of his sight and continue on the pilgrimage that God had called him to complete, in the same way we must look to Jesus during this time for strength to complete our Journey victoriously, as we continue to finish our pilgrimage all the way to the finish line. The enemy would love more than anything to destroy what God began several months ago, so we can either give in, or give God the glory. I encourage each of us to pray with each other more, and to share each others burdens during this time. May the Lord continue to heal and guide us, as we go into this territory that most of us have never been.

God Bless you guys,

John

Hello everyone, I finally have time to get back on here again. I know I had mentioned a few days ago that I was going to update Judah’s dream and somethings that he told me in greater detail.

     A while back i asked Judah about the dream that he had about Ramey before she passed away (I posted it earlier on a previous page) I kind of just wanted to see if he still remembered it the same. He gave me the same details again about her walking up to Jesus. I don’t know if I mentioned this earlier, because I don’t see it anywhere, but there was a crowd of people behind Jesus as Ramey was walking up to him. So I asked him about the scene a little more. He said mom walked up to Jesus and he had his arms raised, and there was a white man with blonde hair on Jesus’ right side, and a brown man with light or orange hair on Jesus left side, and they had their arms raised as well. He said the people were all behind them and were waiting to say hi to mom. It filled me with so much joy when I heard that. It wasn’t until later that I realized the significance of the dream. As i was reading through Acts chapter 7 in which the apostle Stephen was telling the history of Jesus and how the Pharisees had killed the very Messiah that they had been waiting for. Just prior to Stephen being stoned to death by these same men he said in verses 54-58 that “I see the heavens opened and the Son of man standing on the right hand of God.” As I read Jon Courson’s commentary on this verse he said that “Often times we read of Jesus sitting at the right hand of God, but here we see Him standing, not in anxiety, but to welcome Stephen into glory.” What an awesome thing to think about. Jesus is not worried, or stressed when we go through hardships or face death. He knew that Stephen was about to die, and Jesus wanted to be the first to stand and greet Stephen on his victorious entry into Jesus’ everlasting kingdom. In the same way Jesus knew that Ramey was entering into His kingdom victoriously as well and wanted to be the first to greet her at the entrance. How beautiful, I never thought about that before, what a sweet thing to think that Jesus will be waiting to greet us to say “Well done good and faithful servant.” It gave me great joy because I realized that was his plan all along, and she went willingly, and Jesus was glorified. In the same way will we go willingly through our own trials and death, or will we go kicking and screaming missing that grand entrance of “Well done good and faithful servant.” I know that most of us know, or have someone in our family going through cancer or another disease that could very well take their life. We have to remember to never give up hope, never stop allowing God to use us for His glory up to the end, and that this life is just a precursor for our life to come. These sickness and trials are for only a season. As the Lord said in Jeremiah 29:11, ”My thoughts toward you are good…. to bring you a future and a hope.” Our future and a hope is no matter what difficulties we are going through, God is not looking down on you in anger but in Love, He’s got a glorious, wonderful place prepared for you and me. Don’t be afraid of death, but continue to live everyday in a way that shares the hope and goodness of Jesus Christ to those around us. I know its hard to understand, but we can’t fully understand God’s plan until we see Him face to face, and at that point we will see that all things really do work out for our good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28). It’s going to be worth it, every bit of it.

John